Can it last? A look into the future
For sale: sought after GP
Jobhunter this week muses over an estate agent-style approach to the GP job market for the long-term unemployed
If you have trouble getting a job through the usual routes, how about advertising via an estate agent?
Here's a selection of our current ads:
·Tumbledown but charming GP.. Dating back to circa 1860. Leans to one side and in need of some support. Well plastered, double glazed, centrally heated. Ideally located near pubs, clubs, etc. Large tank capable of storing several gallons. Occasional leaks, but nothing that cannot be sorted out by experienced urologist.
·Stunning, desirable Penthouse sweet. Immaculate, large double frontage, well-lacquered, stylish brassy knockers. Superbly landscaped spacious rear with lots of room to accommodate nebuliser, cautery, etc. Suitable for adaptation in bedroom. Much sought after, must be seen.
·Small single-story salaried GP in need of lots of attention. Current employer moving as far away as possible, hence quick sale.
·New on the market. Detached, totally vacant. Can be adapted to accommodate most needs, eg locum, salaried post etc. Suit employer looking for a blank canvas.
·Prewar substantial doctor. Full of character. Enormous larder capable of storing vast amounts of food. Some attention needed to thatch. Foundations beginning to show signs of stress and may need underpinning.
·Well-weathered, sturdy, but beginning to show cracks. In need of revalidation. Some work needed in basement area. Deep pile.
·Luxurious top-of-range well-appointed, prestigious doctor. Comes complete with electronic stethoscope, cryotherapy kit and own spirometer. Pricey, but ideal if you're looking for quality and outcome.
·Town GP situated in middle of busy career, several stories, drive-in drive-out for quick getaway. Not suitable as main resident, but useful for short stopover.
·Economy GP, fitted with flowmeter for extra thrift. Uses very little fuel. Polyester soft furnishings. No enhanced services. Suit first-time employer looking for basic, functional doctor.
·Self -contained, requires very little maintenance. Occasional checks to ensure fully compliant with all regulations, otherwise can
be safely left for long
·Buyer beware! For the hard-hat enthusiast only. Dangerous in parts. Structurally unsound doors, can fly off the handle at any moment.
·Smart GP, large capacity loft suitable of storing any size protocol or guideline. Fully wired throughout, modern appearance, previous employer one careful RCGP chairman.
·As seen on TV. This GP has been given the full Carol Smiley treatment on Changing Docs. Now looking a little rickety but leopard skin furnishings a must for the fashionable employer. Still stopped in street by strangers eager to see decorative pipework.
·Close to Looe. Convenient doctor. Suit chain-free employer.
Dr Laurence Knott is a GP in Enfield, Middlesex