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Health Education bosses turn to slavery to solve the recruitment crisis

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Health education bosses think slavery is a damn fine idea.

We caught up with Professor Candid whilst he was posing for his portrait.

Rather than improving conditions to retain doctors we’d thought we’d poke around the third world a bit

Bringing over doctors from a former colony and enslaving them in the NHS to make up the number sounds like a damn fine idea to me,’ says Prof Candid.

‘I wouldn’t say I was a white British imperialist, but I am white and I am British, however, I most certainly am not an imperialist, hang on a second… Dinesh where the hell has all the port gone?’

After taking a slurp of port and re-adopting his heroic pose, replete with military regalia and a hunting dog, he continued: ‘Rather than improving conditions to retain doctors we’d thought we’d poke around the third world a bit and see what we could come up with. If that doesn’t work we’ll just round a few up of ‘em up at gunpoint and give them the old what for with a toy stethoscope and a packed lunch.’

‘Yip Yip hazaar!’ he added. 

Unfortunately we have no idea what that last bit means.

Dr Kevin Hinkley is a GP in Edinburgh

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Readers' comments (4)

  • absolutely on the money!

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  • Bob Hodges

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  • We all are treated as slaves and as slave labour. The NHS abuses everyone, except it will abuse women more soon with the new contract.
    We already have to do so much work which is not paid for so we have to pay for it from our own pockets. With the continual flow of edicts, it seems that the list of these slave labour tasks increase week by week. Unfortunately, far from being a joke, it is real life. What is more dumb, is that we help purpetuate this abuse by working for free.
    You have to laugh as you would otherwise need to cry.

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  • 80 hour weekends without sleep, months without a break when a colleague [ in a 1:2 rota] fell ill.
    The NHS has always been about slavery. Not new. But to use the poverty of some countries to fill posts that the locals do not want, in this age of progress from the dark days of the Empire is just unjust.

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