This site is intended for health professionals only

At the heart of general practice since 1960

Read the latest issue online

CAMHS won't see you now

Jeremy Hunt is in fact a cyborg sent to destroy the NHS

  • Print
  • 4
  • Rate
  • Save

Rumours that Jeremy Hunt is in fact an insane cyborg sent by the Tories of the future to destroy what’s left of the NHS have been confirmed today.

Scientists working at a top secret lab identified a microchip found in one of Jeremy’s socks as a neural-net processor designed by the futuristic corporation Skynet.

‘This is truly remarkable,’ says one of the scientists as he held the microchip up to the light.’It’s beautifully designed and it confirms what we always thought. The Tories, increasingly frustrated that they can’t just destroy the NHS overnight sent the cyborg from the distant future and programmed it with the single, ruthless mission to destroy the health service. And it absolutely will not stop, ever.  I just hope he doesn’t get his hands on a plasma rifle otherwise we’re all f*cked.’

Jeremy, who was seen wandering around London asking bemused tourists for their clothes, their boots and their motorcycles had nothing to say other than ‘Come with me if you want to live’.

Dr Kevin Hinkley is a GP in Edinburgh

Rate this blog  (4.74 average user rating)

Click to rate

  • 1 star out of 5
  • 2 stars out of 5
  • 3 stars out of 5
  • 4 stars out of 5
  • 5 stars out of 5

0 out of 5 stars

Readers' comments (4)

  • Made me snort my coffee! I needed a laugh to get me through the day!!

    Unsuitable or offensive? Report this comment

  • It's unlikely that Hunt would say "come with me if you want to live": All recorded uses of this phrase by a Terminator relate to a T-850 re-engineered to protect humans.

    For a full history of the phrase and its usage, See

    Unsuitable or offensive? Report this comment

  • Gotta admit though excellent Extermination machine, with no fear or remorse....who cannot be reasoned or bargained with!

    Unsuitable or offensive? Report this comment

  • Vinci Ho

    More interesting question :
    Who is John Connor then? Nigel? Chaand?
    And who is Sarah Connor ? Maureen?? Clare????

    Unsuitable or offensive? Report this comment

Have your say

  • Print
  • 4
  • Rate
  • Save