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CAMHS won't see you now

LMC debaters seek to keep up with the Joneses

The LMC conference season kicks off tomorrow with GPs in Scotland the first into the debating bear pit and already there are some serious contenders for daftest motion of the year.

By Ian Quinn

The LMC conference season kicks off tomorrow with GPs in Scotland the first into the debating bear pit and already there are some serious contenders for daftest motion of the year.

Always a favourite with those conference attendees bored with too much roaring about pay, patient care and the Government, Pulse will be keeping a close track on the more humorous takes on general practice which come up for debate.

An honourable mention must already go to Lanarkshire LMC for its motion scheduled for tomorrow's event in Glasgow, suggesting that ‘this conference believes single-handed practices are like pandas', on the grounds that ‘ most patients like them but once they are gone they are gone forever,' rather than that they sit around eating bamboo all day and are notoriously difficult to breed.

No doubt there are one or two GP pandas nursing black eyes elsewhere in Britain too.

But Pulse's favourite motion so far comes from a conference where the biggest endangered species appears to be any LMC secretary without the name Jones.

Indeed the touchy subject of the Welsh language looks guaranteed to see fireworks in Swansea, or should that be Abertawe, thanks to North Wales LMC's priceless motion submitted to the event due to take place in a couple of weeks time...‘That conference expresses dismay at the suggestion of the new North Wales Trust being called Betsi Cadwaladr University Local Health Board / Iechyd Lleol Prisysgol Betsi Cadwalader, which is not only a confusing name but is also logistically fraught with problems. The name North Wales is helpful, accurate and concise and widely understood already.'

Perhaps they should change it to NHS Betsi Cadwalader for short.

Obviously when they meet at the UK LMCs event in London in June, LMCs will have their work cut out to keep up with the Joneses, although as the event which once brought us a heated debate on whether the Loch Ness monster existed, we're sure they won't let us down.

'He should work in stand up that one' He should work in stand up that one

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