This site is intended for health professionals only

At the heart of general practice since 1960

Patients love to see their GP arrive for surgery in a limo

Geoff's loving life at his new practice, especially the chauffeur-driven limo that all new partners get. He's already had one or two embarrassing moments which have made him look like a dipstick.

Geoff's loving life at his new practice, especially the chauffeur-driven limo that all new partners get. He's already had one or two embarrassing moments which have made him look like a dipstick.

Ah, the rarefied heights of partnership. One month into the new job and I remain delighted.

The stretch white limo was a pleasant surprise. It turns out to be a new addition. Our practice manager conducted a patient survey and established that patients love nothing better than to see their doctor arrive in a chauffeur driven limo.

By getting the driver to double as HCA/phlebotomist and slotting the entire thing firmly into "access" he was able to get PBC funding. All very neat. Personally I think the discrete blue NHS logo sets off the white paint and alloys splendidly.

It's not all been fun and games though. Shortly after arrival I had an RTFM error. I previously worked in a surgical specialty where power toys were all the vogue, when they worked that is.

I ultimately developed a rapport with one of the company reps through my repeated phone calls. He explained to me that most equipment failures were actually due to a lack of "Reading The Festering Manual" (you can substitute "festering" with whatever word you feel appropriate).

At our surgery we have these super cheap but apparently surprisingly accurate urine dip stick tests.

As they are generated in a certain country bordering the Mediterranean the language is not English, and the letters are not roman. After a handful of somewhat baffling results I had a better look at the bottle.

Yes, the language is inscrutable, but there is a neat line diagram showing quite clearly that I had been holding the strips upside down.

This resulted in a series of somewhat embarrassed phone calls to various patients.

And speaking of embarrassing episodes, I was just reminiscing about a recent experience. It was a cinematically perfect moment of mine that went sour at the last minute.

The preamble is that I am a subscriber to a men's magazine. No, not that kind of magazine.

In fact, the editors are clearly aware of how innocuous the magazine must appear in its position firmly lower down than the top shelf: they compensate by periodically adding "saucy" supplements to the magazine. I tend to bin these fairly promptly.

Now, on with the story. It was one of the rare, clear days of this past summer. I was cycling cautiously along with two plastic shopping bags dangling from my handlebars.

At a crucial point one burst, sending paper recycling spiralling everywhere. Cursing under my breath I dismounted and started to collect the scattered sheets.

To my surprise, the pretty girl walking the other way stopped and began to help me. The sun was shining, birds were singing, and a gentle breeze ruffled the wildflowers along the path.

No doubt had it been Keanu Reeves and Jessica Alba the next shot would have been a café where the couple would be laughing shyly but with increasing confidence.

However, in my case a sudden frost abruptly interrupted the initial pleasantries. Wordlessly she handed me a glossy supplement entitled "Dirty Stories by Dirty Girls" and walked away.

Note to self: Stick to the BMJ and Pulse in the future.

Geoff Tipper - enjoying his new surgery's stretch limo for partners Geoff Tipper - enjoying his new surgery's stretch limo for partners

Rate this article 

Click to rate

  • 1 star out of 5
  • 2 stars out of 5
  • 3 stars out of 5
  • 4 stars out of 5
  • 5 stars out of 5

0 out of 5 stars

Have your say