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Pill could prevent heart disease

Yesterday at the practice we had the visit from the local infection supremo. Nice lady, very thorough.

We all complied with the directive not to wear nail varnish that day, although I had an irresistible urge to pick my nose while admiring her clipboard.

The practice manager and practice nurse were in attendance for the duration of the visit of 2.5 hours, so this represented a consumption of 7.5 man-hours.

I was just about to go into a darkened room with a damp cloth over my head when I was informed that a member of the PCT would visit us soon to do criminal records bureau checks. The letter from the PCT said: 'Non-compliance of this exercise may result in the PCT removing names from the medical performers list.'

Medical performers. So it's official: we are circus animals jumping through hoops. The future is here, folks.

Dr Rod Manton



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