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Losing my auriscope... and my moral compass


when visiting without a stethoscope, ask for a china cup, insist that it should be bone china if at all possible. Apply cup to the back in the standard two places (right and left) and give instructions to take deep breath, hold it, breath out slowly through pursed lips, say 99 etc. Then grasp the posterolateral ribs with both hands, vibrating them slightly and instruct the patient to cough. These procedures have no clinical value but are immensely impressive and thus both reassuring and therapeutic. Adding exclamations, 'ahhh, just as I suspected', 'remarkable', and 'are you sure that cup is bone china?' complete the effect. Best payback is when patient later tells you that they are disappointed with a colleague relying on a sats monitor and not employing the tea service. These are the forgotten arts of medicine, along with the careful study of specimens that the patient has 'saved in the toilet for you to look at' PS for the benefit of any GMC CQC trolls, Copernicus is just making a joke.

Posted date

02 May 2018

Posted time