This site is intended for health professionals only

At the heart of general practice since 1960

Read the latest issue online

CAMHS won't see you now

Still unsure who to vote for? Try K Hole's new quiz

  • Print
  • 3
  • Rate
  • Save

If you’re still unsure of who to vote for, keep it simple and try these scenarios:

1 A patient comes to you asking for a long prescription of gabapentin and diazepam because it’s the only thing that helps her back pain. Do you:

a) Tell her that a glass of Chateau Petrus and a Daily Mail should help

b) Offer a shiatsu back massage and a spoonful of mango coolie

c) Tell her that the Burmese rail line wasn’t built on such platitudes

d) Point out that she makes a valid point but she needs some extra regulation and a five-year plan

2 A patient would like a full body scan please because she’s been feeling a bit off-colour of late. Do you:

a) Offer her a firm hand shake and a private referral

b) Hold her hand, stroking the back of it, saying that you’re with her while licking a ripe aubergine

c) Tell her that what we need is a bloody good war

d) Tell her she makes a valid point but needs some extra regulation and a five year plan

If you answered mainly As, you’re a Tory: Bs, you’re a Green; C, UKIP; and D, Labour.

Happy voting!

Dr Kevin Hinkley is a GP in Aberdeen

Rate this blog  (4.57 average user rating)

Click to rate

  • 1 star out of 5
  • 2 stars out of 5
  • 3 stars out of 5
  • 4 stars out of 5
  • 5 stars out of 5

0 out of 5 stars

Readers' comments (3)

Have your say

  • Print
  • 3
  • Rate
  • Save