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A faulty production line

A few more acronyms for GP life

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GPFV, 5YFV; do you ever leave a meeting and wonder what on earth was being discussed as we get lost in a world of acronyms? Just to add to the confusion, I’ve come up with a few of my own.

Without us things could be a whole lot worse

It has come to my notice that we are currently enjoying summer. This will be followed by autumn. Then winter. Just like last year. Do you recognise a theme here? I have a prediction to make - it will be cold this winter. There may be an increase in demand for healthcare. We in primary care will do our best in difficult conditions but it is possible that hospital admissions will rise and secondary care will need a few more beds. I don’t think that CRAPACT (community rapid action proactive access to care team) will cut the mustard. AAAAH (avoiding awfully avoidable admissions henceforth) has not yet come up with the goods. When our local secondary care trust cannot perform urgent bowel surgery within one year of going on the waiting list, you know the months ahead could be tricky.

Bless good old NHSE who try their best with BUNG (blocking unprecedented numbers going) to entice GPs to stay. They have even set up a new task force - NOIDEA (new office of information dealing with employees’ actions) but really they are just shuffling deckchairs waiting for the recession to end.

What they don’t seem to grasp, is that primary care actually functions pretty well. Without us things could be a whole lot worse. Primary care has not ground to a halt yet and shut the doors, despite exponential demand and dwindling numbers of interested physicians. So my suggestion to Simon Stevens’ hapless area teams (SSHAT)?

Fund us correctly knowing our fine form.

If only I had an acronym for that.

Richard Cook is a GP partner in Hurstpierpoint, West Sussex. You can follow him on Twitter @drmoderate

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Readers' comments (3)

  • Borrowing from the above and the military dictionary...
    FUBAR - Funded up beyond all recognition
    SUSFU - Situation unchanged, still funded up
    SNAFU - Situation Normal, all funded up
    BOHICA - Bend over, here it comes again

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  • Here's the only acronym you need to put into action when practicing in the UK



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  • "Fund us correctly knowing our fine form" to Simon Stevens. Brilliant.

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