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CAMHS won't see you now

Using my blogging power to fight for the important issue of trousers

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When Pulse first asked me to do this blog six months ago I didn’t really see the point. After all, I thought, who would possibly want to listen to little old me? But soon enough, an interesting pattern began to emerge.

Surely it is time for me to start exercising my new-found powers on the truly important medical issues

I wrote a blog about the pointlessness of appraisal; then I notice a study confirming that ‘the current appraisal and revalidation system in England appears to be contributing to the workforce crisis’ (read all about it in the International Journal of No Shit Sherlock).

Coincidence? Maybe. Then I wrote about seven day working; and suddenly the experts are saying 'seven-day services cannot be achieved within current funding’ and we await the eventual publication of their findings in the Annals of Well, Duh! Y’Think?

Now, within a week of the appearance of my rant about firearms paperwork, the BMA turn around and advised GPs to stop filling the forms. OK, I’m not saying that I was the only reason for the BMA’s volte-face – that’s for others to say – but if, and frankly there is no other possible explanation for this sequence of events, if my little blog is influencing the zeitgeist in this way, surely it is time for me to start exercising my new-found powers on the truly important medical issues that face us today.

Which brings me to trousers. You might have noticed it’s been a bit hot recently, and like many GPs I work in an office without air con. I’m getting tired of seeing patients breeze through in light summer clothes ('Ooh, it’s warm in here!’) while my standard-issue-30-something-GP-uniform beige chinos double as a scrotal bain-marie. And with global warming upon us, this can only get worse.

What I’d like to do is go to work in shorts; but a recent high-level study I commissioned suggests this might offend every third patient. (I anticipate comments below like ‘I’ve been happily consulting in a mankini for thirty years and no-one’s complained’ but I have suspicions these will come from the kind of crusty Treebeard colleagues who make Jeremy Corbyn and John McCririck look like Queer Eye For The Straight Guy.)

Well, I’ve had enough. I’m writing this blog in the expectation that within days there’ll be a new Cochrane meta-analysis proving trousers cause zika virus, and the CQC will introduce a mandatory sarong policy. If it doesn’t work, I’m going to try my hand at influencing the world for evil instead. Or maybe just buy a bigger fan. 

Dr Pete Deveson is a GP in Surrey. You can follow him on Twitter @PeteDeveson

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Readers' comments (7)

  • Suggest you look at some suitable tailored varieties. Or wait til the rain comes.

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  • some of us (and I now see some schoolboys too) wear dresses when it's really too hot :)

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  • Copperfield writes...

    I was asked by my practice manager, "Why do you come to work in shorts?"

    "Because I have great legs. Got any more dumb questions?"

    GP 1 Employee 0 😎

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  • For the avoidance of doubt, photographic evidence on Twitter @DocCopperfield

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  • TTIUWP (or should that be TBIUWP?)
    We need photographic evidence to inform our decision on whether or not shorts are appropriate for you.

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  • Scrotal bain-marie. Funniest expression I've heard for a long time.

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  • Way too much info re the scrotal state!
    What about a kilt?

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