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This pay ‘rise’ might just push me beyond boiling point

Copperfield

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Sorry to state the bleedin’ obvious, but Jeez it’s hot. I am sitting in my consulting room – a room, I’d add, with no air con and with windows I can’t open on account of the pneumatic drilling going on right outside – and the temperature of 29.5 deg C has melted me into a puddle of sweat beneath my chair.

It’s certainly frying my brain, and it appears to be frying the brains of others, too. The mother of a baby I saw in emergency surgery this morning was concerned that he has been suffering from a low temperature and that the Calpol she’d been administering hadn’t raised it to normal levels.

The nurses and I spent lunchtime fanning ourselves and sipping iced water while planning, with manifest incredulity, the forthcoming flu vaccination campaign.

And I received a letter from the mental health team this afternoon telling me that the thought processes of a psychotic patient I’d referred urgently yesterday, who was so paranoid that he’d boarded up his windows and checked my desk for bugging devices, were ‘within normal limits’ (then again, this is Essex, so maybe that’s right).

The world has been turned upside down, in terms of both temperature and logic

In short, the world has been turned upside down, in terms of both temperature and logic. And that, presumably, must be the explanation for the recent statement made by the new health secretary Matt Hancock, or Matt Hancock the app (I haven’t worked out which is which yet).

He/it said, regarding our latest sub-inflation, sub-DDRB recommendation pay ‘rise’ that, ‘GPs face a significant challenge in numbers and we need to recruit large numbers over a short period, meaning any pay rise needs to be balanced against our aim for a growing number of practitioners’.

I won’t patronise you by offering an alternative economics/workforce argument which reaches the polar opposite conclusion, but I do feel a tad patronised by Matt Hancock, or Matt Hancock the app.

In fact, I can feel my temperature rising. And given I’m already at boiling point, that’s quite something.

Dr Tony Copperfield is a jobbing GP in Essex

 

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Readers' comments (12)

  • This man seems to talk nonsense.1) We need more GPs so give them no pay rise. 2)if the apps reach re wrong diagnosis we need to change the rules??

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  • You have to admire the Conservative party who can consistently provide us with politicians of this class.
    I thought with Jeremy they'd broke the mould, but no! It appears we have been saved again.

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  • Matt the app?

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  • Is no minister of health better than this new guy in England? I just ask from a Northern Ireland perspective where we have been deprived of thiis mandarin for over 18 months now......

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  • we need a minister of health app

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  • Communist NHS needs communist economic pay and recruitment logic!

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  • Lol. I’ve just seen that the nurses historical pay rise is in fact smoke and mirrors.

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  • Communist NHS run by Tories 😂

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  • Can we call him ‘Mapp’?

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  • Aluminium chloride hex-hydrate 20% solution is good to use for sweating this summer ! by the autumn when the falling tree leaves will block the railways tracks we will be out from the E.U ,by the winter when the snow will block the roads we will see the inflation dropping- by the spring when the trees fall as per gales there be 0% inflation by the next summer as the average temp will be 38 c we will have deflation of - 4% -s why 2% increase! keep it 1% it is just 4 seasons to go - not of Vivaldi or Haydn both composed 4 seasons - we are having ours !!

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