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Dom annoying

If he's heard it once, Copperfield's heard it a thousand times - no GP prescribes Dom Perignon

I never really know how people are supposed to react to those 'Tales from the Frontline' snippets that appear in the trade press. 'Send us an amusing anecdote about the time a berk with a common rail diesel motor turned up at your garage asking you to check the carburettor… make us laugh and win £25'.

GPs are just as bad, 'An elderly patient of mine still insists that her motility stimulant is named after a famous champagne house...' writes Dr Mopp from the Camberwick Green Health Centre, Trumptonshire, 'she tells all her friends that I'm prescribing "Dom Perignon".' If I've seen that story once I've seen it a hundred times, and it wasn't really funny first time around.

So, if you are the Dr Mopp in question, who keeps sending the story in to your local paper or favourite magazine every five or six month to supplement the fizz fund, please stop. £25 won't buy you much Dom Perignon anyway and it's really, really, starting to get on my nerves.

'Sick Notes' by Dr Tony Copperfield is out now, available from Monday Books

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