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Read my lips award

The Department of Health promised no new targets and Sir John Oldham, the GP heading up its efficiency drive, wasn't going to let anyone pin the blame on him for breaking that pledge.

He insisted that the DH's goals to reduce unplanned hospital admissions by 20% and A&E visits by 10% by the end of 2013 did not constitute ‘targets'. Even though, by his own admission, they ‘have to be achieved' and ‘there is no plan B'.

Sir John shares the award with the DH press officer who earnestly explained to Pulse that they couldn't be targets, because targets were the old government's policy.

Dr John Oldham