By Lilian Anekwe
Our roundup of news headlines on Thursday 25 March.
I've waded through reams and reams of Budget analysis this morning and I'm still unclear about two things: why the word Budget requires a capital b when it appears in print, and why no matter what politicians announce I never seem to get any richer. Sigh.
The NHS knows how I feel. A report by the Office of National Statistics found that three pence in every pound spent on the NHS is wasted – which works out at £3bn a year, The Times Says.
The Independent says a report by the National Patient Safety Agency found the risk of dying or suffering some other catastrophe while in NHS care has fallen by a quarter, which frankly is a huge relief as I'm sure I'll need a liver transplant eventually.
Continuing on the theme of death, the Daily Telegraph warns the trendy baby slings favoured by yummy mummies everywhere ‘could kill babies', which is almost certainly not what they were designed for.
The Daily Mail keeps telling the same story about gender-bending chemicals in baby bottles over and over and hoping no-one will notice.
It also reports that talking to babies will ‘boost their brain power' so much more than ignoring them, or communicating through a complex hybrid of Morse code and instructions to dribble a little bit for ‘yes' and a lot for ‘no'.
Best use of a vaguely-scientific sounding word today goes to the Mail's story on contact lenses infused with vitamin E ‘nanobricks' that could be used to treat glaucoma.
A friend of mine swears blind that I have a inherent need to eat every three hours otherwise I get the grumps. So could the answer to her prayers be a herbal pill that can cut my appetite?
Why yes, says the Daily Mail, which reports that people who take a daily dose of Zotrim, a widely available supplement made from South American plants, ate on average 500 fewer calories a day – the equivalent of two bars of chocolate or a kebab.
Spotted a story we've missed? Let us know and we'll update the digest throughout the day...Daily Digest - 25 March 2010