This site is intended for health professionals only

A prescription for love

Patients seeking GPs

Woman, 45, but could pass for 44 in the dark: Seeks understanding doc who likes to prescribe generously and never tires of listening.

Man, 38: I’ll keep this short and sweet before the Prozac wears off: 'misery seeks company'.

Woman, 48: Interests include homeopathy and crystals, proud owner of a Feng Shui astrolabe, seeks unhinged professional for strange conversation. 

GPs seeking patients

Man, 52: Save it - anything you want to say can be said to my lawyer. I enjoy uncomfortable silences, drinking vodka and plotting cold, cold revenge. If you’re not my ex-wife, why not write to box number 1499.

Man, 40: Moderately competent, WLTM a wealthy woman with dodgy ticker. But in reality will settle for anyone with low expectations and even lower blood pressure. No sense of humour required.

Woman, 38: Burnt out and brassed off, if confronted can do things with a proctoscope that would make your eyes water. No time-wasters and no malingerers.

Dr Kevin Hinkley is a GP in Aberdeen