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Fresher’s Week for young medics

It’s Freshers’ Week again and medical school campuses around the country are alive with excited chatter. 

We caught up with Steven who’s just started his first year. He told us: ‘Freshers has been great, I’ve survived my first real hangover and even found time to join the Socialist Workers Party.

And in a desperate bid to project a false image of myself I’ve purchased a copy of Das Kapital, I listen almost exclusively to the Smiths and I’ve grown a hipster beard. Because I can.’ 

Steven, who from now on wants to be known as Stevo, said: ‘In real life my mum buys my pants for me, but since coming to university I’ve thrown myself into an alternative life style of sitting cross-legged on pavements, using the word zucchini and smoking basil roll-ups. Have you got any paracetamol, by the way?’

‘My flat mates and I had our first bonding night,’ said Katie, a first year medical student who insists on wearing a floral crown. ‘This mainly involved talking about our A-levels and our year spent travelling the world. Except I spent the whole time working in Gap to give me enough money for the gas bill. Please don’t tell anyone.’ 

Stevo said: ‘I’ve heard all the warnings about how shit a career in medicine is because both of my parents are GPs, but I’ve decided to ignore them because I’m different. Besides, what else can I do with 20 A-stars?’

‘I can’t wait to have all of my hopes, enthusiasms and expectations slowly eroded away by bitter experience,’ he added. 

Dr Kevin Hinkley is a GP in Aberdeen.