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Referendum fallout



A patient with metastatic cancer came to see me the other day and said she’d just had liposuction because she didn’t like the shape of her backside.

Who do you think cleans your bathrooms, drives your taxis and wipes your grannies’ arses?

That, by the way, was my attempt at a joke to lighten things up and the patient interaction didn’t actually happen. It’s called a metaphor. Now for any people who voted out in the recent referendum (I doubt if there will be many) I will explain all the grammatical terms carefully.

The above example is saying we, the UK, are like a terminally ill patient. That is we have lots of really serious problems. The removal of bum fat is a cosmetic problem, some would argue not really a problem at all, in this case it is an analogy for questioning our EU membership.

Now I am guessing that most of people who voted out have never visited a nursing home in the wee hours. Well I have, many times and guess who answers the door to you nine times out of ten… it’s one of those scrounging eastern Europeans who come over here and take all our red eye shifts in care homes looking after our demented octagenarians (that’s irony by the way).

To paraphrase a quote from the film Dirty Pretty Things: who do you think cleans your bathrooms, drives your taxis and wipes your grannies’ arses? (that is a rhetorical question).

But that does not do justice to the endless list of filthy, backbreaking, tedious, poorly paid and unpopular work done by the immigrants because the indigenous population are too lazy, feckless or incompetent to do it themselves.

Now I’m sorry if I have offended anyone who voted out, no, actually I’m not. Do you realise what an utter and complete mess you have thrown the country into?

Putting aside the fact all the leaders are resigning or being pushed out and nobody (not even the idiots who instigated all this crap) knows what to do next, without an immigrant population our health service is not going to survive.

In case you hadn’t noticed the NHS only runs because a section of the workforce are prepared to work long antisocial hours for low pay and lots of them are immigrants.

Sorry there is no hopeful end note here, but regarding the out vote, the resultant racism and all the other fallout – none of this is in my name (and that is just a fact).

Dr David Turner is a GP in west London