Having succeeded in his attempts to turn the entire healthcare profession against him, Jeremy Hunt will finally get the chop in 2016. His admission that he was wrong to try to impose the junior doctor contract will come too late after thousands of GP trainees, who insisted they were only flying to Sydney to see the New Year’s Eve fireworks, are never seen again.
The usually eloquent PM ends the questioning by saying, ‘the NHS just needs a bit of sugar’
Mr Hunt will go into hiding, prompting Daily Mail reports that he has escaped to the US where he can pay to see a GP on a Sunday without being judged and rumours about who could be next to take the Richmond House reins. There will be further confusion at Prime Minister’s Questions when David Cameron is grilled about the current state of the NHS, and the usually eloquent PM responds with an uncharacteristic fumbling of words, and ends the questioning by saying, ‘the NHS just needs a bit of sugar’, reducing the Opposition and most of his own MPs to perplexed silence.
Fears will mount that the PM may have lost control of the NHS – and perhaps his mind, but when Mr Cameron tweets he is on his way to the boardroom and posts a selfie in a black cab with the hashtag #You’reHired, it won’t be long before the news breaks – Lord Alan Sugar is to be the next health secretary.
The Apprentice star will be seen as an unusual choice for the post, but some outspoken doctors will come forward in full support, saying a no-nonsense approach is needed to help sort the NHS out. The PM will announce that, although Lord Sugar had previously expressed allegiance to the Labour party, he feels he really was the only man for the job.
Lord Sugar will continue with The Apprentice, saying being health secretary is not a full-time job. His helpers Karen and Claude will do the public-facing duties while he controls his business interests from an oversized desk in Whitehall.
Dr Salma Aslam is an FY1 doctor in the North-East